The Darker Side of my Heart (Redux)
by AngelicDevil152
Summary: Haruka Nanami has always been liked. Her naive, yet kind demeanor seemed to draw people to her, but her friends have been neglecting her, leaving a severed bond in their wake. In addition to this, Starish's girlfriends physically and mentally abuse her. Will Nanami's fragile heart collapse from the pain? Or will her dark side lash out?
1. Chapter 1

"_Fate is such a cruel thing, weaving people's destinies into a giant web of lies. For what binds us are not delicate red threads, but suffocating chains that force the innocent onto their knees, staining their pure hearts with crimson until they bleed and cry for mercy"_

**Summary:**Haruka Nanami has always been liked. Her naïve, yet kind demeanor seemed to draw people to her, but her friends (Starish) have been ignoring her. They seem to neglect her and only refer to her as the 'composer' of the group, and their girlfriends aren't any better, if possible they treat Nanami worse. Calling her names like 'slut' and 'whore' and causing her physical damage as soon as nobody is looking. When she tries to tell Starish about this they don't believe her. Will Nanami's fragile heart collapse from the abuse? Or will her darker side lash out?

**Relationship(s): **Haruka x Everyone

**The Darker Side of My Heart**

**Chapter One**

**Narrator's POV**

_Crunch. _Shrill screams and vulgar insults filled the once silent room. A pale girl laid on the floor, her skin covered in bruises, courtesy of the figure that loomed above her. A wide smile was stretched on the figure's face, a cold, bloodthirsty glint in her cold eyes. Sharp, manicured nails ran down the victim's arms leaving trails of angry scarlet on the girl's once flawless, porcelain skin. Bone-shattering blows were delivered by the aggressor causing pitiful whimpers to spill out of chapped lips. The rusty scent of her own blood permeated the room, filling the pale girl's nose before her vision blurred; colors and shapes becoming hazy; then fading to black.

**Nanami's POV**

I woke, startled from my nightmare. Sweat and tears clung to my body like a second skin leaving an uncomfortable sensation in their wake. I grabbed at my pillow and screamed into it to relieve some of the pent up frustration and pain I felt. I've long given up self-pity and hope, acceptance of the agonizing and relentless cycle I live is the only way to bare it. No use to cover things up when you have no one to care right?

**Nobody** cared.

And It _hurt_.

To be ignored, to be treated like a lesser being, with my heart bleeding every time a hurtful retort was thrown into my face.

They told me I was filthy, nothing but a talentless whore. The injuries that were inflicted upon me may have been physically damaging, but nothing would ever compare to the wounds inflicted on my soul and heart. They want to break me, but how can they do that when I've long been demolished into nothingness. _I am worthless, because a human being can't be of any value or use if they're just a shell of their former selves._

For every thought I made an incision, relishing the numbing sensation of cold metal cutting into my skin. I smiled at the pretty crimson that poured out of the gashes like blooming flowers. I kept slashing, the feeling was addicting, I accepted the fact that I was worthless as the blade carved into my skin.

**Unknown POV**

I stared down at the pathetic, whimpering mess underneath me. Unconsciously feeling a tinge of guilt before internally shaking it off, reminding myself that I was superior to _**her. **_

A voice inside my head started whispering, the voice was gradually becoming louder, painfully resonating through my head.

It spoke in a smug, cold tone of voice.

_You know that isn't true, you are the inferior one. Look at yourself, a mere coward, staining your hands with the blood of an innocent girl because you are envious. Don't even try to deny it because after all, you and I both know that you're just a pointless waste of space, right?_

**-The Next Day-**

**Nanami's POV**

Waking up never used to be such a drag before, but I guess things change when you start to dread living.

I slowly slid out of bed, relishing every moment I had by myself in solitary comfort before trudging to the bathroom and glancing in the mirror. My custard colored eyes had deep set, purple bags under them and my hair had severe bed head. Sighing, I grabbed my hairbrush and violently started raking it through my orange tresses.

After finishing one task, I mechanically started another, functioning almost as if I was a machine. _Brush my teeth, dress, and eat they all required no thought process. _

Following my daily morning routine was work, which although used to be the best part of my day, was now the most hated. Starish and I have long grown distant, and any close or personal ties we had with each other have been severed. I no longer hold any importance to them besides being their composer. Happiness is a foreign feeling to me in this point of time, whereas sadness is the most common emotion I experience nowadays.

Shaking these thoughts from my mind, I slung the strap of my messenger bag over my shoulder and started my regular trek through the bustling city of Tokyo and to the studio where Starish records all their songs. Before entering through the contemporary style glass doors, I took a deep breath, and prepared myself for the worst.

HERRO EVERYONE! I'm back with the redux of The Darker Side of My Heart. I'm sorry I haven't updated for practically a year ;o;. I lost a lot of my writing inspiration when school started. But I finally got it back. I'm also going to soon have four more fanfics up, three of them are probably going to be one-shots, and three are going to be for Attack on Titan. I am literally obsessed with this series right now.


	2. Chapter 2

Herro everyone with another installation of The Darker Side of My Heart! Sorry for the irregular update, my friends and I are planning a trip together to Sacanime 2014, it's for three days so we have a lot to do like book the hotel, figure out the chaperones, and finalize who's going. Not to mention my mom and I still need to schedule an appointment with the eye doctor for my colored contacts. I'm going as Kuroko Tetsuya for Kuroko no Basuke 'cause he is just so cute (I would insert a heart here but they don't appear after the chapter is published DX).

**Summary:**Haruka Nanami has always been liked. Her naïve, yet kind demeanor seemed to draw people to her, but her friends (Starish) have been ignoring her. They seem to neglect her and only refer to her as the 'composer' of the group, and their girlfriends aren't any better, if possible they treat Nanami worse. Calling her names like 'slut' and 'whore' and causing her physical damage as soon as nobody is looking. When she tries to tell Starish about this they don't believe her. Will Nanami's fragile heart collapse from the abuse? Or will her darker side lash out?

**Relationship(s): **Haruka x Everyone

**DISCLAIMER! DISCLAIMER! I FORGOT TO PUT THIS IN THE FIRST CHAPTER! I NO OWN UTA NO PRINCE-SAMA ;O;**

**The Darker Side of my Heart**

**Chapter Two**

**Nanami's POV**

My shoes squeaked against the pristine wooden floor of the studio as I anxiously walked through the hallway, dragging my trip out as long as I could.

_It's ok, you've become used to pain, it's impossible to hurt if you can't feel. Just get it over with, go in, do your job, then get out as fast as you can with as little casualties possible._

With these thoughts I collected myself and pushed against the glass entrance of Starish's recording room.

_Hmmmm? Why isn't this door opening? Wait, is it pull instead of push? I guess I still have some of my airheadedness from from a few years back. _

Mentally facepalming, I grabbed the metallic handle then pulled the door open, expecting to see fourteen people, give or take some, conversing as usual on the L-shaped, black leather couch that rested in the center of the room. Instead, I met silence and vacancy, which made me exhale a sigh of relief and ungracefully fall onto the couch.

After a while of stalking the unmoving ceiling with my eyes, I turned on my side and reached into my bag and pulled out a few song idea filled papers, looking for a potential hit. A few quiet minutes passed until I found what I was looking for. The song had a happy beat, and a certain warmth that had my lips curling at the edges. I glanced at the clock which read fifteen minutes pass our meeting time.

_I wonder if I should leave now and just leave the song here for them to look over? But it's only been it's only been fifteen minutes, I should wait a bit more so I don't seem like I'm purposely avoiding them. _

I killed time for another fifteen minutes by starting a new song before gathering my things and going home.

**-Time Skip-**

When I arrived home the face my my clock read half-past eleven. Letting out a tired sigh I lazily slid the strap of my bag over my head and placed it on it's usual place near my piano.

_I should probably kill time by composing new songs until lunch. _My hands skimmed the smooth, ivory keys of the piano, causing a small crescendo of sound to fill and echo throughout my empty apartment.

I took a deep breath and straightened my back as I began to play, my hands passionately dancing on the keys, the melodious tunes pulling me from reality and into my own little world.

Once in a while I would snap out of my focus and write down compositions that I thought were worthy of revision; otherwise I was completely absorbed in my work. Play. Listen. Write. These three actions repeated in a seemingly endless cycle until I eventually ran out of breath and glanced at the clock again.

_It's three quarters after noon, maybe I should go out to eat since I ran out food. I can go to the market afterwards and get my monthly groceries._

I grabbed my keys off the kitchen counter, slipped on a pair of flats, and left my silent, modest home for the loud, flashy modern streets of Tokyo once again.

I held my slightly sweaty palm against my warm forehead as a fruitless attempt to soothe myself as a familiar dizzy feeling came upon me, the too-bright colors of the many advertisements blurring together. I stumbled back, accidentally colliding with someone in the process; turning around, I muttered a slurred apology before my eyelids became heavy and I fell onto the hard cement sidewalk. Looking up, I saw a slender, alabaster arm reaching out towards me.

"Are you alright?"

**Review Replies**

**Guest: **Thanks for the review and support! I hope you keep reading and enjoying "The Darker Side of My Heart: X3

**Yuki Kaito: **YES MAM! AND PLEASE DON'T DIE, HERE ARE YOUR MEDS IN THE FORM OF POORLY STRUNG TOGETHER WORDS XD

**Forever or Never: **Pretty name ;o;. And thanks for the compliment and I will keep writing; will you keep reviewing X3?

P.S I can relate guuuurrrrlll, I dislike OCs in fanfics too, god I'm such a hypocrite XD


End file.
